30 weeks, a hospital visit, community, and true peace.

i know. i know. it's been a disgustingly long time since we last updated everyone. i just honestly haven't been in the mood to write. which makes me a little bit sad, because i really wanted to document this pregnancy a lot more than i have. in the scheme of things, that's not what is really important.

basically a thousand different things have happened. the overall theme of what we have been learning this past 30 weeks, has been that Jesus is awesome, this little gem of a daughter we have been blessed with is his and not ours, and living in community is vital to life.

10 weeks ago, we went to the doctor to find out what our sweet little baby was going to be, would we be blessed with a lady baby, or a little man. we were so excited to see what the LORD was going to bless us with! it was one of the most exciting days of my life as i walked into that ultrasound room. i knew that in the next few moments our lives were going to be so different. it was a sweet, sweet time. as the nurse was looking around at our sweet little baby, (who nick was seeing for the first time..) i was thanking Jesus for all of her arms and legs, and her heart and her sweet tiny lips. the nurse had a hard time finding out what our little baby was; her legs were crossed and she was NOT letting anyone see her secret. at the same time, nick and i both silently prayed that she would move so we could find out... and she moved! "it looks like a girl!"- my life was changed forever. i would be the mother to a precious angel and nick would be the father to a beautiful daughter. we could not stop thanking and praising Jesus for the sweet news!

later that day we also found out that our sweet lady baby had what is called an echogenic intracardiac focus. which basically means that they found a spot on her heart. at the time they were not sure what that meant, or what it could be. so they sent us to maternal fetal to get an extra look. we had tons of our wonderful friends praying for us and our little one. during that time Jesus blessed us with an overwhelming sense of peace. peace that i had never known. we just knew that this baby was his baby and we were just taking care of her. i found such comfort in knowing that he was going to do whatever he wanted to do with her life. i still find such comfort and peace in that. the LORD is faithful, and they soon discovered that the spot on her heart was nothing to worry about. Isn't Jesus sweet?

fast forward to this past thursday. it was a regular day... i was heading out to work around 6:50am and nick was still at home, getting ready to go to work himself. i packed my lunch, kissed him goodbye and headed out the door. as i was walking to my car (and i am still not clear how this happened) i fell and landed on my belly, on the sidewalk. after the initial shock of falling ( and noticing that my knee and hand were bleeding and pretty scraped up..) i thought i should just get up, gather my things and head to work so i wouldn't be late. then Jesus stopped me and i felt this sudden urge to pray. after a quick prayer i realized that my fall was serious so i called nick and he rushed outside to help me come back in the apartment. we both called our work, let them know that we were going to be a little late, and then i called the doctor. the doctor told me to come into labor and delivery as soon as possible and that i would be monitored there for at least 4 hours. So, we went. on the way there i said to nick, "Worse case scenario is that we could come home with a baby." and then we giggled and thought, "that's so not going to happen."

we arrived at the hospital and were sent to triage... where i layed on a strecher for seriously hours, with monitors attached to me, one for me, one for our sweet maggie ( another post coming soon on why we picked her name!) my mom and brothers came to see us, they spent about 2 hours with us and then left becuase everything seemed just fine. pretty soon after they left i started having contractions. i had NO idea that this was happening because they were pretty far apart and not painful at all. we just wanted to go home so badly... i was growing very impatient and started feeling some dull pains in my lower back and some cramping. the nurse came in and asked if i had felt any of that, and i really wasnt sure what she was talking about. she then informed me that i had been having contractions and that they were 2 mins apart! So we were going to spend the night at the hospital! during this entire time, we had at least 40 people praying for us. God is good. Jesus is sweet, becuase we felt such peace. both of us knew that the LORD was taking care of us... and how that even if they had to deliver our little maggie that day, that he would have already known that. i can not express enough how gracious Jesus has been. i never could imagine myself as calm as i was, it is only by his grace and mercy. my contractions eventually stopped, we spent the night in a labor and delivery room. basically having a "dress rehearsal" for the day that maggie is born. which is actually really awesome because now we know where everything is, what to expect ( a little) and what it feels like to be in the hospital. we know what to pack in our bags, how to contact people quickly, and nick knows how to keep me calm. its actually a blessing because now that we are familar with what to do, it doesnt seem as scary to us. :) Maggie is staying put for now...

the point of all of this is just to show how wonderfully sweet and gracious Jesus is. he was our strength, he was our provider, he gave us peace, and wisdom. He poured out his love and protection to our little family. He used this trial to bring Nick and i as closer than we have ever been. we were able to see what living in community is like, people offering meals, and prayers, and visits. i have had countless wonderful women offer to come help me clean my house, make us dinner, and just encourage me. thank you, to all of you who are helping and offering. we are in awe at the outpouring of support! i know that if we didn't have the community around us that we do have, i would be falling apart. God designed us to live in community with others... and when you do, you feel that so strongly. its such an amazing blessing.

Peace. it is what i thank the LORD for the most. without it, i know i would be a ball of anxiety ready to burst. i know my husband would be the same way. Jesus is gracious and allowing us to feel immense peace during this hard and what could be stressful time. instead of those things, we feel grace, peace, and love. our LORD is amazing. truly amazing. now we wait... wait for the LORD to bring miss maggie pearl to us in his time-- whatever that may be. we could not be more excited... and to be perfectly honest, we are ready to hold our sweet little blessing anytime that he chooses. as we start the next 10 weeks, we look forward to our little family of 2 becoming a little family of 3, and we look forward to cherishing all the last moments we have together, alone. these next 10 weeks are a treasure. just like the tiny girl that is moving in my belly as i type.

xoxo-

a