i was at a play date last week and heard some other mamas talking about all the things they do as a parent that they said they wouldnt do, and it made me giggle because i had such unrealistic expectations of what being a mama would be like.
i will not be the mama who lets her toddler watch more than 1 tv show a day.
i literally laugh out loud at this one. i was so sure i would not let my toddler watch more than 1 tv program a day. so sure. not that i had anything against moms who did, but i thought i was going to really, easily nail this one. the truth is, maggie loves tv. and while i am not always proud of the amount that she watches some days, its really the only way to get things done when she is awake. now dont get me wrong, i dont let her sit in front of the tv with zombie eyes all day long, while i surf pinterest and paint my nails. but, if i am making her breakfast, or cleaning up the kitchen, or getting ready for the day, the girl watches a show or 2. when maggie wakes up in the morning, she is usually a grouch. i need my coffee to help put me in a good mood, she needs elmo, or dinosaur train. if she doesnt take a long enough nap, or is failing to nap at all - i snuggle that bug on the couch and throw on lalaloopsy {which i am convinced is crack for toddler girls because it kinda does make her go a little zombie eyed} so she is quiet and contained. before she goes to bed, she gets to watch a few episodes of peppa pig {they are 5 mins each}. i used to feel a boatload of mom guilt about the tv - and sometimes when she whines asking for the "mote" i get that guilt in the pit of my stomach. but for the most part, i am perfectly ok with the amount of tv she watches on a normal day.
if i have a little girl, she will wear a dress and headband every.single.day.
ok. you can roll your eyes with me. i dont know where i got this silly idea that it would be easy to always put my daughter in a dress and headband. first of all - she is not a doll, but a person. a person who honestly hates anything on her head. and a person who most of the time would prefer to go around naked. i had really good intentions of always putting her in a dress - heck my gramma used to always have her girls in dresses, but the truth is, i would much rather be in leggings than a dress, and so would maggie. and who really cares? it is not important in the least bit. this was such a silly expectation. i do however, make sure she wears more dresses than pants to church and to birthday parties and special events. just because. and i have sadly given up on headbands and hair clips. i know in a few years she will be able to wear them, at least i hope! {also, that little girl in the photo is so cute!}
i will not give my child formula.
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this was something i didnt want to do for lots of reasons. breastfeeding is natural and cheaper and i really wanted to do it. but my body couldnt. and i didnt expect that - or want that. in fact, i was downright angry about it for a little bit. but now i cherish the 3 months that i was able to breastfeed, and i am thankful that there is an alternative for mamas who cant {or even mamas who just dont want to}. i dont regret a single bottle of formula that i gave to miss maggie. not one.
i will never put my child on one of those leashes. she is not an animal.
although i have never done this yet, i'll tell you i am tempted every single day. maggie does not like the stroller for more than about 3.5 seconds. she would rather
my child will never drink a bottle after she is 1 years old.
maggie loves her bottle. she has this intense need to suck before falling asleep, and as hard as i tried, she doesnt like a paci. we have cut down on the bottle significantly since the 2 year mark is in our very near future, but she still gets it before bed and at naptime. and i dont feel an ounce of guilt about it. if she is 3 and still using a bottle then i'll worry about it, but she is not even 2 yet. i think its okay.
i will not be the mom who gets a mom haircut, wears yoga pants everyday, and doesnt wear makeup.
somedays it is all i can do to brush my teeth. i dont have a newborn anymore, so i dont really have an excuse to say that, or to wear yoga pants 4 days a week - but sometimes making sure i look presentable is the last thing that i want to do. i would much rather spend the extra time in the morning that i have alone to read my bible, or eat breakfast without sharing. i know now why mamas probably own more pairs of yoga pants than yoga instructors - they are easy, and if paired with the right top, they actually look presentable. and while i didnt get a mom haircut right off the bat, i grew my hair into a lions main just to prove i didnt need short hair, and now that i just cut of 7 inches of that mess, i dont know why i didnt do it sooner!
those are just a few of the things that i have changed my mind on since becoming a mama. i am sure there are tons more, and more to come. i am so thankful that these are all things to hold loosely when it comes to raising a child, because it doesnt matter how your baby is dressed, or if you bottle feed or breastfeed, or if you let your kiddo watch tv or not. if you are striving to be the best mama that you can be, and following what convictions are given to you by Jesus - then i think you are doing a fabulous job. what things did you think that you would never do as a mama, but find yourself doing?
The bottle is one for us too. I can't get Susanna to drink enough milk during the day, but she'll guzzle 6 oz before bed if I put it in a bottle. So thankful she finally drinks milk! I was also convinced that I would produce a veggie-loving baby who only ate homemade food. Well. Jarred food was convenient and the only green thing Susanna will eat with her fingers is a green bean. The kid lives on blueberries, cheese and yogurt. I figure that since we eat a lot of veggies, eventually she will too.
ReplyDeleteSome things did turn out the way I thought: she sleeps on her own (we worked hard for that, as did you!), she looks adorable, and she has us wrapped around her little finger.
This is such a great post! My son is only 3 months old and I've already x'd out a few of the "nevers" I'd had on my list (the formula thing being one of them). Thanks for sharing! Glad to be your newest follower.
ReplyDeleteIn grace,
Claudia
www.LashesAndBeard.com