sweet like honey: rest

you know when the LORD is trying to teach you something & he just keeps sharing it with you over & over & over again?
well, that is just what is happening with me.

a few weeks ago at redemption group i was talking about how i am so tired. i feel like i am carrying so many things that are heavy on my back. a sweet girl in my group encouraged me with this verse,

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest."

matthew 11:28

it was just what i needed to hear. i mean, really. i have known this verse for as long as i can remember. it was even one of the verses that i had my husband read to me during labor. but lately it is been a life changing verse.

i have been carrying so many unnecessary burdens on my back.

like, if i have offended people recently.

or if i am being a good enough friend.

or what everyone thinks of the way that i look.

or how well behaved my girl is.

should i get a job outside of the home?

do we have enough money?

am i being a loving wife?

now, some of those things are good to be mindful of, but i carry them around like heavy bricks that i just wont give to the LORD.

why wont i give them up?

one word.

control.

i want it. i crave it. i {think} i need it.

if i just let go and allow Jesus to carry those burdens, i feel like i am just giving up.

and in a sense, i am.

and that scares me.

because if i give it all up to him, what if his plans for me are different than the ones i had for me?

what if the road he wants me to walk on is hard?

i am scared of what he would have for me.

what i am learning is that when i do let go and let God sit in the drivers seat, my life is full of joy and peace.

when i am in control its full of worry and anxiety.

why am i so quick to give up that joy and peace and trade it for the worry and the anxiety?

yesterday i heard a small portion of a radio show.

they were talking about felling weary.

the man said, " if you are feeling weary and heavy laden, just come to Jesus. lay those burdens at his feet and he will give you rest."

ahh. sweet rest. thats what i desire.

so, right there, in my car i gave Jesus the worries of my day.

i was on my way to the dr, because my little girl had the weirdest diaper rash i had ever seen. when i called they said they wanted to see her right away.

fear started to sneak into my heart.

i began to play the 'what if...' game.

but there, in that moment i gave all those worries to Jesus.

and, {like he always is} Jesus was right.

he did give me rest.

now, i want to commit myself to start giving those things that make me feel heavy over to the LORD. its going to be a slow process, but i am going to keep at it.

i can not wait to see what else Jesus has for me to learn in this area.

what about you?

are you feeling weighted down?

weary?

carrying unnecessary burdens?

come to Jesus.

he will give you rest.